Best Tips and Strategies for Empty Nesters
The natural circle of human life includes children growing up and leaving the nest. Even though parents know that phase is coming one day, it can still be difficult. The empty-nester phase of life is interesting. Some empty-nesters embrace this as a time of newfound freedom, yet some experience new challenges they were not expecting.
I have two children who are twenty-three months apart in age. When the oldest child moved away for college, I experienced some mixed emotions. But when the last child left home, I experienced feelings of loss. I had a hard time dealing with this new chapter of life. Instead of dwelling on the negative feelings, I decided to be intentional about embracing this phase of my parenting journey. Today I’m sharing some of my best tips and advice to help empty-nesters who are struggling.
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What is an empty nester?
An empty nester refers to a parent whose children have grown up and moved out of the family home, leaving the parents with an “empty nest.” This term is often used to describe the stage of life when parents transition from actively parenting their children who have reached adulthood to living without them in the household. Empty nesters may experience symptoms of empty nest syndrome, including a range of emotions during this transition, including sadness, relief, excitement, or uncertainty as they adjust to their new roles and responsibilities.
VeryWell Family shares more about the clinical diagnosis of empty nest syndrome. In addition to the information shared there, here are some additional symptoms parents may experience as they adjust to their new normal:
- Feelings of sadness or loneliness
- Sense of loss or grief
- Increased anxiety or worry
- Lack of motivation or interest in activities
- Difficulty sleeping or changes in sleep patterns
- Increased irritability or mood swings
- Loss of identity or purpose
- Decreased self-esteem or confidence
- Changes in appetite or weight
- Difficulty concentrating or focusing
- Excessive worrying about adult children
- Withdrawal from social interactions
- Physical symptoms such as headaches or stomachaches
- Struggles with decision-making
- Increased dependence on alcohol or substances
- Feeling disconnected from partner/spouse
- Obsessive thoughts about adult children’s well-being
- Difficulty adjusting to newfound freedom
- Longing for the past or nostalgia
- Challenges in finding new interests or hobbies.
What are Some Tips to Help Parents Adjust to This New Phase of Life?
My husband and I are empty-nesters, and honestly, it took us a little while to figure out what to do with all the free time we suddenly had. Here are some tips for empty nesters that worked for us:
- Embrace the newfound freedom.
- Maintain communication with adult children.
- Rediscover hobbies and passions or explore a new hobby.
- Explore new jobs or new opportunities at your current job.
- Nurture relationships with partner/spouse. This is a perfect time to focus on quality time with each other.
- Seek support from friends and community. (Check to see if there is a support group in your area.)
- Seek professional help if the symptoms don’t improve.
How Can Empty-Nesters Celebrate the Holidays?
The holidays can be a difficult time of year for empty-nesterds. Here are some tips for celebrating the holidays after your children have moved out:
- Create new traditions.
- Honor traditions while adapting to change.
- Embrace the opportunity for smaller, more intimate gatherings.
- Plan special activities or trips.
- Manage feelings of nostalgia or loneliness.
What Are Some Fun Things to Do as Empty-Nesters?
Empty-nesters can use this phase of life to explore new activities and hobbies. Here are some ideas of things to do:
- Travel and explore new destinations.
- Pursue further education or career opportunities.
- Volunteer and give back to the community.
- Engage in physical activities and wellness pursuits.
- Invest time in personal development and growth.
- Rekindle old friendships or make new friendships.
How Can Empty-Nesters Practice Self-Care?
The empty-nest phase is the perfect time for couples to focus on self-care. Here are some self-care tips that are perfect for empty nesting:
- Prioritize physical health through exercise and nutrition
- Practice mindfulness and stress management techniques.
- Nurture emotional well-being through therapy or support groups.
- Carve out time for relaxation and hobbies.
- Cultivate a sense of purpose and fulfillment.
What Are Some Tips for Embracing This Next Chapter?
- Acknowledge and process emotions surrounding the empty nest.
- Communicate openly with family members about expectations and needs.
- Allow yourself time to adapt to the new phase of life.
- Find joy and fulfillment in newfound independence.
- Seek professional guidance if needed.
What Are Some Positive Aspects of Having an Empty Nest?
The good news about the empty nest is that it isn’t all negative. Here are some positive aspects of having grown children:
- Increased Freedom: Empty nesters have more freedom to pursue their own interests, hobbies, and goals without the responsibilities of parenting.
- Enhanced Relationship with Partner: With children out of the house, empty nesters can focus more on their relationship with their partner, nurturing intimacy and connection.
- Personal Growth Opportunities: Empty nesters have the chance to focus on personal growth and development, exploring new hobbies, furthering education, or pursuing career advancements.
- Reduced Financial Strain: With fewer expenses related to raising children, empty nesters may experience a reduction in financial strain, allowing for more financial flexibility and stability.
- Greater Independence: Empty nesters have the opportunity to rediscover their independence and autonomy, making decisions based solely on their own needs and desires.
- More Quality Time: Empty nesters can enjoy more quality time with themselves, their partner, and friends, fostering deeper connections and meaningful experiences.
- Opportunities for Travel: With fewer responsibilities tying them down, empty nesters can take advantage of opportunities to travel and explore new destinations, creating lasting memories.
- Renewed Focus on Health: Empty nesters may prioritize their health and well-being, dedicating more time to exercise, healthy eating, and self-care practices.
- New Beginnings: The empty nest stage represents a new chapter in life, full of possibilities and opportunities for personal fulfillment, growth, and happiness.
- Rediscovering Passions: With more time and freedom, empty nesters can reignite long-forgotten passions or explore new interests, providing a sense of fulfillment and purpose.
- Simplified Living: With fewer people in the household, empty nesters may find that their daily routines and household chores become more manageable, leading to a simpler and more organized lifestyle.
- Expanded Social Circle: Empty nesters have the opportunity to cultivate new friendships and social connections, whether through community involvement, clubs, or events, enriching their social lives and support networks.
- Pursuing Higher Education: Empty nesters may consider furthering their education or pursuing lifelong learning opportunities, such as attending classes, workshops, or seminars, to expand their knowledge and skills.
- Embracing Spontaneity: Without the constraints of a busy family schedule, empty nesters can embrace spontaneity in their lives, saying yes to impromptu outings, adventures, and experiences.
- Contributing to the Community: With newfound time and resources, empty nesters can become more involved in their communities through volunteering, mentoring, or participating in local initiatives, making a positive impact and leaving a legacy.
- Strengthening Parent-Child Relationships: As children transition into adulthood, empty nesters can shift their parenting role to that of a mentor or advisor, fostering mutual love, respect, and understanding in their relationships.
- Rediscovering Self: Above all, empty nesting offers the chance for individuals to rediscover themselves, reconnect with their values, dreams, and aspirations, and embrace the fullness of who they are.
An article in USA Today further supports the positive aspects of the empty nest.
The transitional period of becoming an empty nester can be a mixture of emotions, especially for parents who may feel a loss of purpose as their youngest child leaves the nest for the first time. But, with the right perspective and a mindset shift, you can turn those negative feelings into positive ones.